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Monday, September 28, 2009

a conversation...

as i lay here in my bed...
all i can think about is you...
how it feels to be under your lovelust embrace.
here i lay on my back... starring at the ceiling...
looking at my ceiling fan as if it is the moon...
that is accompanied by you...
my constellation... my personal arrangement of stars.
your smile makes my heart flutter...
your laugh brings joy to my soul...
...and your conversation entices me.
sadly this feeling is only temporary...
for with you i have to live in the moment...
...and only for the moment...
cause at any moment... you... could keep it movin'.
we are so close... but yet so far...
this thing is growing...
into what?
...is what my heart is in search of knowing.
your eyes say everything...
but my heart needs your words for validation.
maybe our hearts should have a conversation...
and come to an agreement...
with no interruption from our minds.
love and logic is lies...
...so let our hearts do the talking.


© the thoughts and feelings of graham, 2009


~Thanks for reading...
and if you haven't clicked that follow button on
the right side above my loyal community, please do
and join the Land of Complex Serenity.
Love & Peace... Avi'Qon


Friday, September 4, 2009

a moment of vulnerability...

ok members of the land of "complex serenity" and friends... allow me to be an open book today. i feel the need to be vulnerable and express how i am feeling.

for those of you who aren't in to the floacist.. marsha ambrosious' mixtape... track #10 some type of way... please get into her cause that song describes my emotions right now. now i'm not freakin' out crying or anything but i just feel some type of way.

i went against my word... i wanted to make him work for it... the feeling hit me and i initiated the call. it was good... it's always good... but it's only temporary and now i am feeling the error of my ways.

ugh... why did i do it? i really liked him. i wanted more out of this... i should have kept my "piece." when the feeling hits you... it hits you... lord work with me... i'm still learning how to die to my flesh... and sex is definitely a weakness.

i am delivered... or at least i am claming my deliverance... therefore i confess my sins publicly.

i gotta stay away from what i will call "chocolate milk"... it truly makes my knees buckle.
but i think he has made the decision for me since i haven't heard from him.

i must admit he had me blindsided cause he came rapped in the total package... but no matter how he's delivered... a nigga is a nigga.

but i can't blame him for how i feel... it was a concious decision that i made... i must deal with my decisions accordingly... but along with that comes conviction and that never feels good.

you live... you learn... then you hold your "piece."


~Thanks for reading...and if you haven't clicked that follow button on the right above my loyal community, please do and join the land of Complex Serenity.

Love & Peace... Avi'Qon