untitled... it just speaks.

what do you do when the shoulders of which you once stood
have now... collapsed?
what do you do when you are bursting to express yourself...
but feel as if your words have lost their essence?
what do you do when you have the love of your life...
but then when you and he combine to make one that is both of you...
that one falls into eternal slumber from right under you?
what do you do when your happy and sad at the same time?
you've been taught to seek their approval...
when in all actuality that approval doesn't mean shit.
but that's all you know do.
i'm starting something new...
because i need to take my sanity back from you.
i'm stressed...
i'm crying...
i'm stretched...
i've sought to find my joy...
but what brings me joy doesn't fit your definition...
you make me pay for it.
your words sting...
your stares burn a whole in my heart...
if it's hurting you so bad then leave me alone and let me be.
i'm tired of it.
what you took from her...
will not be taken from me.
this is a vicious cycle that will never be broken...
but i will be the speed bump...
cause this life on display for me just wont be.
independence is the best policy.
starting new love,
new traditions,
new support,
new care,
new vocabulary,
new actions,
for me and my family.
its funny how things turn when things get tight.
i once had your support...
but now its not alright.
how can the team conquer the fight,
with bipolar cheerleaders on sight?
but slowly i'm learning to cheer myself on...
cause my life whether it's to your liking...
has to go on.


© the thoughts and feelings of graham, 2009

~Thanks for reading...and if you haven't clicked that follow button on the right above my loyal community, please do and join the land of Complex Serenity.
Love & Peace... Avi'Qon